Orgasms Equal Forgiveness
by SlackerDee
Summary: Eric makes a booboo but promises something that makes Sookie instantly forgive him. *humorous/sarcastic piece*
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own SVM.**

**Author's Notes: So, I may have stopped working on my SVM stories, cause I was starting to feel burned out, but I haven't stopped reading SVM stories completely. I still have a few I faithfully stalk. That being said, in my time in the SVM fandom I've noticed a startling trend. Sookie-haters. Yes Sookie can be whiny, bitchy, and stupid, in the books and in TB. But what gets me is the pedestal that a lot of fans seem to have Eric on. Because of this, no matter what Sookie does that hurts Eric, whether it is completely justified or not, she gets slammed for it. And I find it annoying. So since it seems that what fans what, Eric fucking up and Sookie instantly forgiving him, I present this little ditty.**

**Orgasms Equal Forgiveness**

"What do you mean you are loaning me out to the King of New York?" I demanded as I glared at my lover.

"He likes blondes. And you are so tasty that your blood will secure me my alliance," Eric replied, his eyes locked on my chest.

I huffed and crossed my arms over my generous bosom. "I am not a snack bowl of chips to be passed around at a goddamn Super Bowl party."

Eric pouted and dragged a single finger down my neck and lower, dipping into my cleavage. "This alliance is important and as my wife it is your duty to serve me in whatever fashion I wish. Besides," his lips quirked in that sexy smirk that never failed to make my panties melt. "I will make it worth your while."

I squirmed as my panties dampened. He was giving me that look that promised dirty filthy things. When his blue eyes had that gleam it was hard to be mad at him. Eric was way to pretty to stay angry at. What is a little blood when I would have his head between my legs?

I threw my arms around his neck and nipped at his jaw. "Okay I forgive you but don't do it again."

"The Queen of North Carolina will be here next week an she likes women."

I rolled my eyes and was going to protest when Eric did that thing with his tongue on that spot just below my ear. As his mouth traveled down my neck, I had one thought: I better get lots of orgasms for this. An Eric orgasm was a very convincing reason to forgive.

**Author's Notes: I wrote this piece, and in now way do I stand by it other than it was something I wrote spur of the moment, after talking with a friend and fellow author about all the Sookie hate. I won't say who it was or what story brought on the conversation, just that it is a new story and is very well written. Her Sookie gets pissed at Eric and actually stays pissed at him. Go her! But some of the reviews are just insane and completely bash Sookie, simply because it's Eric Sookie is mad at. I made a comment about how I felt like writing something where Eric does something horrible but Sookie instantly forgives him because of his pretty face and awesome bedroom bedroom skills. She was all do it and in five minutes I had this. This is purely sarcastic and poking fun at Eric fanatics. There is a reason I prefer to write Sookie and Alcide and here it is. Also, know that if I get flames for this I really won't care. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own SVM**

**Author's Notes: I couldn't resist writing another one. The infamous Eric lies but Sookie should ignore the lies cause he's so pretty and sexy and has the orgasm giving fingers!**

**Orgasm Equals Forgiveness**

I curled up on the couch and watched as Eric walked through the door and grinned at me. There was a healthy flush to his face and a sparkle in his eyes that told me he just fed. Jealous swamped me, my own little irrational demon. I knew that Eric couldn't constantly feed on me, thus his need for donors. But something had felt different tonight. Thanks to that damn blood bond I couldn't always escape Eric's feelings. And he was feeling very, very happy an hour ago. More happy than he should if he was just feeding.

He leaned down to kiss me and I pulled away, frowning up at him. His eyes narrowed and he said, in that low voice that made my nipples tighten, "Lover, what is wrong?"

"What did you do tonight?" I asked instead of answering. He would tell me. We had worked hard to get to the point where Eric didn't feel the need to lie to me. So I wasn't worried.

"Had a meeting with Pam about the club and since I knew I would be seeing you and I fed on you two days ago, I used a donor to satisfy my hunger. You know what drinking fresh blood does for me."

"A woman?"

Eric just gave me a 'you know the answer to that' look and nodded once. "Yes, you know that Pam prefers to keep women for those uses."

"Uh huh," I said, wondering how I was going to phrase my next question. I really wanted to know why he felt so damn happy about drinking someone else's blood. "And did anything else happen?"

"No, she was well enough but I couldn't stop thinking of you and how I'd rather be piercing you with my fangs," Eric growled and sat down close to me, leaning in to sniff my neck. "You smell delicious."

I felt my head dip down and to the side, giving Eric better access to my neck. That's when I saw it. Lipstick stains on the top of his pants. Bright. Red. Lipstick. As if someone, some nameless blonde whore, had used her mouth to undo his button and zippers. Outraged I jerked away and smacked at him.

"Eric Northman! You let some donor skank give you a blow job!"

"No I didn't!" Eric protested and tried to lean in for another nibble.

I glared at him and gestured towards his pants. "So what, you just got the perfect impression of a lipstick covered mouth on your pants because you loaned Pam your pants?"

"Oh," Eric said looking down. "That."

"Yes that," I snapped. "I can't believe that you would cheat on me. And then lie about! Or did you forget that I could feel your emotions thanks to this stupid insane bond you forced on me?"

"I did forget that," Eric said carelessly as if me finding out the truth was no bother. "I don't see why you are upset, she wasn't as good as you. Kept choking and you never choke."

Instead of being insulted, I felt a little thrill at the praise. It was no easy feat deep-throating Eric's impressive cock without choking. The fact that I could do it and not some skank couldn't was really a self-esteem builder. Eric grinned and one hand slid up my naked thigh. I was just wearing a oversized tshirt and in no time his fingers were stroking through my wet folds, making completely forget why I was angry at him. The man's fingers deserved to be bronzed. How could I possibly stay mad at him?

**Author's Notes: What? You know that's how it is supposed to happen. Cause Sookie shouldn't be all pissed at him, cause he loves her mad blow job skills!**


End file.
